All the approaches to goal setting are based on linear goals: they were created for controlled environments with predictable timelines.When the future is uncertain, we overthink every possibility and we conjure worst-case scenarios, and we tend to fall back on one of three defense mechanisms, where we abandon our curiosity, our ambition, or both:1. Cynicism2. Escapism3. Perfectionism

Linear Goals

It is a simple and repeatable activity that will inevitably bring you closer to achieving your authentic ambitions, regardless of the actual result of each trial.It follows a simple format: I will [action] for [duration].You need enough trials to obtain results you can trust.The repeated trials of your pact provide you with more reliable information to make decisions.

Pact

There are three viable alternative routes after completing a pact: Persist, Pause, Pivot.PERSIST: Showing up consistently over a long period of time.PAUSE: To admit that a course of action is no longer serving you and to bow out gracefully.PIVOT: When you decide that a course correction is needed, your next step is to understand how much change is necessary.

The ancient Greeks had not one but two words to speak of time:1. Chronos refers to quantity, the time of clocks and calendars, of productivity tools and linear goals.2. Kairos expresses the quality, recognizes that each moment is unique, when we are immersed in activities that capture our full attention, when we spend time with loved ones, or when we are engaged in self-reflection.

It means being deliberate about where you invest your efforts, recognizing that you cannot be at the very top all the time and across all areas of life.To put the principles into practice, you just need to adjust those three ambition dials:1. Identify perfectionist patterns.2. Challenge your unrealistic targets.3. Choose progress over perfection.

Intentional imperfection

Making progress requires two essential components: trial and error.1. The trial part of the loop involves taking action with limited information.2. The error part involves observing the results and making adjustments based on that data.When we use trial and error, we set in motion a series of growth loops where progress emerges in conversation with our environment.

Growth Loops

Any disruption that derails these plans feels like more than just a change in direction: it’s a direct attack on who we are and our place in the world.THE TWO-STEP RESETSTEP ONE:- Pause and lean into these emotions.- Put feelings into words.STEP TWO:- Pinpoint the direct impact of the disruption by zeroing in on the most noticeable effects.- Then map out potential consequences.

Disruptions

A community will give you access to a collective set of knowledge, skills, and physical assets that vastly exceed your own.Your network’s diverse expertise and talents will complement your own abilities to expand your potential.Communities can provide critical help when you are navigating new or difficult situations.They offer emotional support, advice, and a sense of belonging.

Social Flow

By embracing the unknown and staying open to serendipity, you create space for unexpected opportunities to emerge — opportunities to learn, grow, and create value in ways you may not have initially imagined.

Unpredictability

9 Powerful Lessons from "Tiny Experiments" by Anne-Laure

A transformative guide to rethinking our approach to goals, creativity, and life itself from a neuroscientist and entrepreneur, and the creator of the popular Ness Labs newsletter "I loved this profound, practical, and generous book."—Oliver Burkeman "A thought-provoking guide to doing more trials and making fewer errors."—Adam Grant "One of the best productivity books that I've read."—Ryder Carroll "This book will change the way you design your goals and live your life."—Nir Eyal Life isn’t linear, and yet we constantly try to mold it around linear goals: four-year college degrees, ten-year career plans, thirty-year mortgages. What if instead we approached life as a giant playground for experimentation? Based on ancestral philosophy and the latest scientific research, Tiny Experiments provides a desperately needed reframing: Uncertainty can be a state of expanded possibility and a space for metamorphosis. Neuroscientist and entrepreneur Anne-Laure Le Cunff reveals that all you need is an experimental mindset to turn challenges into self-discovery and doubt into opportunity. Readers will replace the old linear model of success with a circular model of growth in which goals are discovered, pursued, and adapted—not in a vacuum, but in conversation with the larger world. Throughout the book, you will ask hard questions and design simple yet meaningful experiments to find the answers. You will learn how to break free from the invisible cognitive scripts that shape your life, how to harness the power of imperfection, and how to make smarter decisions when the path forward is unclear. This is a guide to: • Discover your true ambitions through conducting tiny personal experiments • Dismantle harmful beliefs about success that have kept you stuck • Dare to make decisions true to your own aspirations • Stop trying to find your purpose and start living instead Tiny Experiments offers not just practical tools to make sure our most vital work gets done, but a guide to reawakening our curiosity and drive in a noisy, busy, disaffected world, so that we can discover and pursue our most authentic ambitions while making a meaningful contribution.

productivity

Productivity

Understand yourself and those around you.

psychology

Psychology

personaldevelopment

Personal Development

mindfulness

Mindfulness

books

Books

Anne-Laure Le Cunff

Tiny Experiments

Rest is essential for muscle recovery, healing, and overall well-being. Without it, the body breaks down instead of getting stronger.

Physically

Rest helps with clarity, creativity, and problem-solving. Overworking leads to burnout, while strategic pauses improve focus.

Mentally

In meditation and self-reflection, stillness often leads to the biggest breakthroughs. The third eye doesn’t open through constant action but through deep inner awareness.

Spiritually

Even in nature, cycles of activity and rest exist. The moon doesn’t shine all the time, and even the strongest wolves retreat to regain their strength.

Energetically

Rest is also progress—it’s just a different form of it.

If you found this post helpful and want to see more content, your support makes all the difference! Feel free to <a href="https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/Dissident7">Support me</a> or Crypto help me keep creating content. Thank you

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Rest is progress.. but it depends on how you define progress.

religionandspirituality

Religion & Spirituality

mentalhealth

Mental Health

meditation

Meditation

Rest is progress 

It’s strange how no one really teaches you how to handle life’s toughest moments. Not parents, not schools, and certainly not mainstream media. Instead, we’re fed the worst coping mechanisms — drown your heartbreak in alcohol, chase meaningless hookups for emotional connection, or seek revenge when you’re bullied. And without realizing it, many people embrace these self-destructive patterns.But I found better ways to cope — ones that actually heal rather than harm. I hope they help you too.

No One Talks About These Healthy Coping Mechanisms—But They Work

Write a love letter to your future partner or remind yourself of the love you already have in your life. love isn’t just romantic — it exists in friendships, family, and even in the small moments you cherish alone.

IF YOU FEEL LIKE YOU’LL BE SINGLE FOREVER…

Don’t chase other people’s validation. Instead, ask yourself why you feel disconnected from yourself. Spend time doing things that make you feel whole — read, paint, take a long walk, or simply sit with your thoughts. Sometimes, the best company is your own.

IF YOU FEEL LONELY…

Going through a breakup is tough because it’s not just the loss of a person—it’s the loss of dreams, routines, and a version of yourself that existed in that relationship.Suppressing emotions only makes them resurface more intensely. Allow yourself to feel sadness and anger, but don’t let them define you. Staying in touch makes it harder to heal—even checking their social media slows the process. Give yourself space—block, mute, or unfollow if needed.

IF YOU’RE GOING THROUGH A BREAKUP…

Congratulations, you’ve just been chosen as their humble servant. Prepare to be judged for your life choices while they knock things off your table at 3 a.m. But hey, at least you have a fluffy overlord now.

IF YOU FIND A CAT…

Understand that jealousy often points to something you want but feel is out of reach. Instead of letting it consume you, use it as inspiration. Ask yourself: what is this feeling trying to teach me? Then, work toward your goals at your own pace.

IF YOU FEEL JEALOUS…

Know that grief is love that didn’t get to be expressed. Let yourself feel it — there’s no rush. Take all the time you need. You’ve suffered a great loss, and you are allowed to cry. Don’t let anyone tell you to “get over it” just because time has passed. Grief doesn’t follow a schedule. But in your pain, don’t turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms like alcohol or drugs. Feel every emotion, but don’t stop taking care of yourself. Cook, practice self-care, meditate — whatever keeps you grounded. Healing doesn’t mean forgetting; it means learning to carry your love and your loss together.

IF YOU’RE FACING GRIEF…

Don’t numb that feeling with quick distractions like porn. Instead, channel that energy into something real — call a friend, spend time with loved ones, or engage in something that makes you feel valued. Physical closeness is only one part of intimacy. Connection is what truly matters.Learn to transmute that energy into something meaningful. I use that energy to work out or pour it into my creative endeavors.

IF YOU’RE ACHING FOR PHYSICAL INTIMACY…

Take a moment alone to breathe and reflect. Once the anger fades, try to see their perspective. Then, communicate with honesty and kindness.

IF YOU’VE FOUGHT WITH YOUR PARTNER…

Don’t fight them. Don’t try to justify everything. Instead, show them respect and ask for the same in return. Tell them: “This is what I’m going to do, whether you believe in it or not, because this is what I truly believe in. Just support my decisions, and if things don’t go the way you anticipated, just be there with me — like a tree, ready to give shade. I will figure it out one way or another. And at least this way, I will never blame you for anything because I would have lived life on my own terms.”

IF YOUR PARENTS DON’T UNDERSTAND YOU…

YOU’RE ALLOWED TO “DEFY” YOUR PARENTS ON THREE THINGS; Your career, who you marry, and how you choose to live your life.These are deeply personal decisions that only you will have to live with every single day. I’m being very careful with my words here — I said defy, not disregard. There’s a difference.

I know it stings. But please don’t take it as proof that you’re not enough. Rejection doesn’t mean something is wrong with you — it just means they weren’t the right person for you. Repeat with me “rejection is protection”. Trust me you will find the right person soon enough.

IF YOUR CRUSH REJECTED YOU…

Stand up for yourself, but don’t let anger push you into regretful actions. Seek help if needed — there’s no shame in asking for support. Many people have been where you are, and you are not alone. I was once bullied too, and I turned to my elder siblings for help. The problem disappeared because I refused to accept abuse for even a second. Know your worth. Don’t tolerate bullying, not even for a day.

IF YOU’RE BEING BULLIED…

It’s okay. Not all friendships are meant to last forever — some people are just chapters in your story, not the whole book. But if you still miss them, reach out. A simple “hey, remember when…” can sometimes bring back what was lost. And if not, cherish the memories and make space for new connections.

IF YOU DRIFTED APART FROM SOME OF YOUR FRIENDS…

Have a heart-to-heart conversation. If expressing yourself feels difficult, write it down and give it to them. Sometimes, words flow more easily on paper. And if they point out something you did wrong, don’t let pride get in the way — apologize. A simple “I’m sorry” can go a long way in healing your bond.

IF YOU HAVE FOUGHT WITH YOUR SIBLINGS…

Ask yourself: is this coming from someone who truly wants me to grow? If yes, listen. If not, let it go. Most of the time, people project their opinions — they rarely speak facts.

IF YOU’RE FACING CRITICISM…

Love yourself first. Cook yourself a good meal, exercise, or do something that makes you proud. Love starts from within.

IF YOU FEEL LIKE NOBODY LOVES YOU…

Call your mom. Ask for your favorite recipe and cook it while on a video call with her. Sometimes, a simple meal can bring home closer.

IF YOU’RE MISSING HOME…

Visit the ocean, watch the stars, or take a walk in nature. The world is vast, and your worries are only a small part of it. Perspective can be powerful.

IF YOUR PROBLEMS FEEL TOO BIG…

Don’t look at the entire mountain. Just focus on the next step. One small step at a time is still progress.

IF YOU FEEL OVERWHELMED…

Name them out loud: I feel anxious, and that’s okay. This simple act reduces their power over you.

IF YOU FEEL OVERWHELMED BY EMOTIONS…

Write your worries down in a journal. Seeing them on paper makes them easier to manage.

IF YOU FEEL STRESSED…

Don’t pace around. Instead, practice deep breathing or meditation. Stillness is more powerful than you think.

IF YOU FEEL ANXIOUS…

Go for a run, stretch, or move your body. Physical activity helps release tension in ways words cannot.

IF YOU FEEL FRUSTRATED…

Write down whatever is on your mind. The next morning, those thoughts that felt so heavy in the darkness will seem lighter in the daylight.

IF YOU CAN’T SLEEP…

Start small. Motivation comes from action, not the other way around. Make your bed. Drink water. Stretch. One small step will lead to another.

IF YOU FEEL UNMOTIVATED…

Stop exhausting yourself trying to explain. Write your thoughts down instead. Sometimes, understanding isn’t needed — just self-acceptance.

IF YOU FEEL MISUNDERSTOOD…

Remember: life isn’t a race. Some people find their path early; others take longer. Your timing isn’t wrong — it’s just yours.

IF YOU FEEL LIKE YOU’RE BEHIND IN LIFE…

Don’t numb the pain with alcohol or unhealthy habits. Instead, turn to creativity, music, or something that soothes your soul like food.

IF YOU’VE HAD THE WORST DAY…

You are not alone. You are loved. And this moment is just one small piece of a much bigger story. Trust me we have all been there.

ABOVE ALL, WHATEVER YOU’RE GOING THROUGH, PLEASE REMEMBER…

If you’re going through something difficult, I hope you find a healthier way to cope. And if you have some better coping mechanism of your own, don't forget to comment. I would love to read those because I am always finding better way of living.

All of these healthy coping mechanisms I found on my own and they helped me significantly. I hope they do the same for you!

loveandrelationships

Love & Relationships

The Guide to Surviving Life’s Hardest Moments

“Mastery requires patience. Habits take time to show results.”

The first two minutes of any habit should be easy.
Once a habit is started, it's easier to continue.
🔹 Example: Want to run? Just put on your running shoes.

The Two-Minute Rule – Start Small

“Standardize before you optimize.”

🔹 Your surroundings shape your habits more than willpower.
🔹 Optimize your environment for success.
🔹 Example: If you want to read more, place books where you can see them.

The Power of Environment – Design Your Success

“Make the cues of good habits obvious and the cues of bad habits invisible.”

Find an accountability partner or use habit contracts.Public commitments increase commitment levels.🔹 Example: Tell your friends, "If I miss a workout, I'll donate ₹500 to charity."

The Power of Accountability – Use Social Pressure

“We repeat behaviors that bring us social approval.”

✅ Focus on Identity, Not Just Goals → Become the person who naturally does the habit.✅ Use the 4 Laws → Make habits obvious, attractive, easy, and satisfying.✅ Break Bad Habits → Reverse the 4 Laws to eliminate negative behaviors.✅ Stay Consistent → Small habits compound into massive results over time.✅ Trust the Process → Even if results aren’t immediate, habits are shaping your future.

📌 Key Takeaways – How to Implement Atomic Habits

“You should be far more concerned with your current trajectory than with your current results.”

problemsolving

Problem Solving

Atomic Habits - part : 2 

Small daily habits compound over time, creating massive impact.
	1% improvement every day = 37x better in a year.
	Key Idea: Focus on systems, not just goals.

The Power of Tiny Habits

“Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.”

✅ They bypass the brain’s resistance to change.✅ They accumulate into meaningful transformations.✅ They create identity-based behavioral shifts.

📌 Why Tiny Habits Matter?

Most people focus on goals (outcomes), but true change happens at the identity level.3 Levels of Behavior Change:<ol><li>Outcome-Based Change – "I want to lose weight."</li><li>Process-Based Change – "I will follow a workout plan."</li><li>Identity-Based Change – "I am a fit and healthy person."</li></ol>Instead of focusing only on the end result, focus on who you want to be and let your actions follow suit. By identifying as the person you want to become, you are more likely to make lasting changes in your behavior and achieve your goals

Identity-Based Habits – Becoming the Person You Want to Be

🔹 Instead of saying, "I want to run," say, "I am a runner." 
🔹 Align actions with the type of person you want to become. 
🔹 Small wins reinforce your new identity.

📌 How to Apply It?

“True behavior change is identity change.”

James Clear's habit-building framework follows these four laws:<ol><li>Law 1: Make It Obvious</li><li> Law 2: Make It Attractive</li><li>Law 3: Make It Easy</li><li>Law 4: Make It Satisfying</li></ol>

The 4 Laws of Behavior Change – Building Good Habits

Design your environment to trigger positive habits.Use implementation intentions: “I will [DO X] at [TIME] in [PLACE].”Habit stacking: Pair a new habit with an existing one.<ul><li>Example: “After brushing my teeth, I will meditate for one minute.”</li></ul>

✅ Law 1: Make It Obvious

“You don’t need motivation; you need clarity.”

Use temptation bundling to build good habits - pair something you need to do with something you want to do. 
 Surround yourself with people who already have the habits you desire. 
<ul>
	<li> Example: "I'll listen to my favorite🎧 only when I exercise." </li>
</ul>

✅ Law 2: Make It Attractive

“Your habits are influenced by the people around you.”

Reduce friction → Make good habits easier and bad habits harder.
<ul>Key tips:
<li>Use the 2-minute rule: Start small so you can't fail.</li>
<li>Example: Instead of "Read 20 pages," start with "Read one sentence."</li>
</ul>

✅ Law 3: Make It Easy

“A habit must be established before it can be improved.”

Track progress: Seeing small wins motivates continued action.Use immediate rewards: Reward yourself for completing the habit.🔹 Example: "Put a checkmark on a calendar every time you meditate."

✅ Law 4: Make It Satisfying

“What is rewarded is repeated. What is punished is avoided.”

Just as good habits follow the 4 laws, bad habits can be broken by reversing them.

<ul>
 <li>❌ 1. Make It Invisible → Remove temptations.</li>
 Example: Keep junk food out of the house.
 <li>❌ 2. Make It Unattractive → Reframe your mindset.</li>
 Example: Instead of “I can’t smoke,” say “I don’t smoke.”
 <li>❌ 3. Make It Difficult → Increase friction.</li>
 Example: Delete social media apps to reduce mindless scrolling.
 <li>❌ 4. Make It Unsatisfying → Add consequences.</li>
 Example: Use a habit contract: “If I skip the gym, I pay my friend ₹500.”
</ul>

Breaking Bad Habits – Inverting the 4 Laws

“The best way to break a bad habit is to make it unsatisfying.”

When it comes to being motivated, finding the right balance is key. It's important that our habits are not too easy or too hard. Instead, they should be just challenging enough for us to succeed (4% beyond our skill level). To avoid burnout, we need to balance discipline with recovery.
Remember: Too easy, and we get bored. Too hard, and we get overwhelmed. The sweet spot is in between.
<ul>
 <li>Motivation = challenge + success</li>
 <li>Find the magic 4%</li>
 <li>Balance discipline & recovery</li>
</ul>

The Goldilocks Rule – Stay in the Zone

“The greatest threat to success is not failure but boredom.”

Habits compound over time, trust the process even when results are slow.
What to Remember:
<ul>
 <li>Progress isn’t always visible at first</li>
 <li>Breakthroughs happen after crossing the ‘Valley of Disappointment’</li>
</ul>
🔥 Stay consistent and trust the process 🔥

The Plateau of Latent Potential – Trust the Process

Atomic Habits: Part 1

Accepting your limitations, stepping more fully into them, is precisely how you build a saner, freer, more accomplished, socially connected and enchantment-filled life.

For finite humans, the time for that has to be now.The future destroys the present.

You’re pretty much free to do whatever you like. You need only face the consequences.To make a decision – any decision – is to take ownership of the situation instead.

The only two questions, at any moment of choice in life, is what the price is, and whether or not it’s worth paying.

Completion of any task replenishes energy, rather than using it up.

The main difference between those who accomplish great things anyway and those who don’t is that the former don’t mind not knowing.

The truth is that no work you bring into concrete existence could ever meet the perfect standards in your mind.

Beyond the mountains, there are always more mountains, at least until you reach the final mountain before your time on earth comes to an end.In the meantime, few things are more exhilarating than mountaineering.

Often the real challenge, in building an accomplished and absorbing life, is learning to let go.

In an age of attention scarcity, the greatest act of good citizenship may be learning to withdraw your attention from everything except the battles you’ve chosen to fight.

When you start to view each day not as a matter of paying off a debt, but as an opportunity to move a small-but-meaningful number of items over your done list, you’ll find yourself making better choices about what to focus on.

It’s often more helpful to ask: What if this task might be a lot easier than I’d been assuming?

Thanks for reading.Follow me for more threads about books.Explore my Link tree: <a href="https://t.co/01nihr1mW2">http://linktr.ee/realmofwisdom</a>Buy your book here: <a href="https://t.co/HTGBwC3nh2">https://oliverburkeman.com</a>

12 Powerful Lessons from “Meditations for Mortals”

A map for a liberating journey toward a more meaningful life—a journey that begins where we actually find ourselves, not with a fantasy of where we’d like to be—from the New York Times bestselling author of Four Thousand Weeks Addressing the fundamental questions about how to live, Meditations for Mortals offers a powerful new way to take action on what counts: a guiding philosophy of life Oliver Burkeman calls “imperfectionism.” It helps us tackle challenges as they crop up in our daily lives: our finite time, the lure of distraction, the impossibility of doing anything perfectly. How can we embrace our nonnegotiable limitations? Or make good decisions when there’s always too much to do? How do we shed the illusion that life will really begin as soon as we can “get on top of everything”? Reflecting on quotations drawn from philosophy, religion, literature, psychology, and self-help, Burkeman explores a combination of practical tools and daily shifts in perspective. The result is a life-enhancing and surprising challenge to much familiar advice—and a profound yet entertaining crash course in living more fully. To be read either as a four-week “retreat of the mind” or devoured in one or two sittings, Meditations for Mortals will be a source of solace and inspiration, and an aid to a saner, freer, and more enchantment-filled life. In anxiety-inducing times, it is rich in truths we have never needed more.

habits

Habits

Oliver Burkeman

Meditations for Mortals

Between what is said and not meant, And what is meant and not said, Most of love is lost.

This quote emphasizes the importance of honest and authentic communication in relationships, highlighting that unspoken words and insincere ones can erode love

Here's a deeper look at the meaning

The quote highlights the common problem of people saying things they don't mean or failing to express what they truly feel or want.

The Gap Between Words and Intentions

It also emphasizes the significance of what isn't said, as sometimes silence or unspoken intentions can be just as impactful, or even more so, than what's verbally communicated.

The Power of Unspoken Words

It underscores the need for genuine and honest communication in relationships, suggesting that love can be lost when people are not open and vulnerable.

The Importance of Authenticity

Open and honest communication is crucial for building trust and respect in any relationship, and these are fundamental building blocks for a healthy connection.

Building Trust and Respect

The quote encourages people to be vulnerable and express their true feelings and needs, rather than hiding behind facades or avoiding difficult conversations.

The Need for Vulnerability

The quote suggests that nurturing love requires conscious effort, including being mindful of both what is said and what is left unsaid.

Love Requires Effort

motivationandinspiration

Motivation & Inspiration

communication

Communication

Khalil Gibran’s Quote | L I F E

Find 100+ Mindfulness Tips & Facts - Curated from inspiring sources like Books, Podcasts & Articles - Genuine Insights from like-minded Users like You!

Tiny Experiments

Rest is progress

The Guide to Surviving Life’s Hardest Moments

Atomic Habits - part : 2

Atomic Habits: Part 1

Meditations for Mortals

Khalil Gibran’s Quote | L I F E

Steal Like an Artist

14,000 Things to Be Happy About.

📖 The Defining Decade – Meg Jay

It's time to
Read like a Pro.

Tiny Experiments

Rest is progress

The Guide to Surviving Life’s Hardest Moments

Atomic Habits - part : 2

Atomic Habits: Part 1

Meditations for Mortals

Khalil Gibran’s Quote | L I F E

Steal Like an Artist

14,000 Things to Be Happy About.

📖 The Defining Decade – Meg Jay

It's time to Read like a Pro.

It's time to
Read like a Pro.