The mass exodus of nearly 48 million workers in 2021, known as the Great Resignation, is turning into regret as people realise that the pastures are not greener on the other side. However, people aren’t willing to grovel before their ex-employers or continue to be unsatisfied. Most people are tired of transactional businesses. They want their work to be meaningful. That’s why it would be wise to cultivate a level of trust that connects your team members deeply and create stronger relationships.

People desire meaningful work

We all carry emotional baggage but tend to be less compassionate when we are unaware of what others are carrying. Cultivating intimacy at work means understanding and honouring each other’s tender spots. It requires vulnerability and openness. Try a simple exercise with your team where everyone shares one emotional thing. You set the tone, so go first and share some challenging moments in your life. You may be surprised to see how many people want to open up.

Unpack issues as a group

If a stranger approached you and asked why you work for your company, what would you say? Most employees would say that they had some early success or that it was their first job. However, these answers are either tied to what is unique about the person nor does it connect to the company’s mission. Lead by example: Figure out your “why” and share it with your team. People want to work with others who feel they truly belong.

Find your why

There is value in sharing your story that explains why you do what you do. Think back to the time you first felt unsafe, then consider what you did to feel safe again. That’s your superpower that you probably used to find your way to success.  Giving people the freedom and safety to share their stories will create a positive domino effect. You’ll see your employees be more creative, innovative and confident. They’ll be more willing to take risks at work. This will cause them to realize their personal and professional growth.

Unearth a shared story

career

Career

communication

Communication

teamwork

Teamwork

leadershipandmanagement

Leadership & Management

Cultivating a sense of intimacy and connection at work

They talk mostly about themselves. Instead of telling them to change their behaviour, it's much easier to get them to motivate themselves to change. Redirect the conversation. When they start to talk about themselves, say that you are very interested and that you know they really like to talk about it. Then change the topic. Ask if you can talk about this other thing. After you've done this a few times, they'll start to realise when they're doing it and might motivate their own change.

Some people talk way too much

Sometimes it's easier to bottle up your feelings than to have a difficult conversation with a friend. Celeste Headlee, author of We Need to Talk, answers your questions about conflict with friends. 

loveandrelationships

Love & Relationships

Dear Life Kit: Should I tell my friend they talk too much? 

Perhaps you've been eagerly anticipating your annual review or a compensation discussion but are discouraged when your boss says: "I'm sorry, but we're not able to adjust your salary at this point. So check back in six months, and keep up the good work." Despite the setback, some strategies can help you maintain momentum.

Asking for a raise

It's human nature to feel hurt and upset after being denied a raise. In the moment, try to respond diplomatically by taking a few deep breaths and identifying your emotions. You may say: "Thank you for sharing that. Not surprisingly, I'm disappointed that the company can't honour my request. However, I'm committed to bringing my best to the organization and hope to continue the conversation about how I can be more valuable."

Respond diplomatically

Unearth possible barriers and pressures that led to your supervisor’s denial. For example, you may be at the top of the salary band, or the organisation is experiencing hard times. In a non-defensive ton, get more details with open-ended questions:<ul><li>What’s contributing to your decision?</li><li>How are compensation and performance evaluated?</li><li>What could I be doing more of?</li></ul> More information can help guide your decision to stay and advocate for yourself or create an exit plan.

Dig deeper

Consider negotiating for:<ul><li>Flex time or a work-from-home arrangement</li><li>Stock options</li><li>A title change</li><li>More vacation time</li><li>Professional development funds</li><li>Funds to upgrade your home office</li></ul>

Propose alternatives

If you’ve been denied a raise, use the opportunity to your advantage. For example, schedule a follow-up meeting and explain that you want to position yourself for a pay increase. Then engage your boss about what you can do to get there.

Continue the conversation

Highlighting your achievements is vital to building a case for a pay raise. Find ways to publicize your successes and impact, such as offering to present a case study in a meeting with important executives or speaking at a conference or on a podcast.

Master the art of authentic self-promotion

Your boss may be one of several stakeholders contributing to decisions about your career path and whether you get a raise. Consider requesting a meeting with your manager’s manager to make them aware of your work and contributions. Build relationships with other key stakeholders to have more allies championing your advancement.

Seek out additional advocates

While being rejected for a raise can be a blow to your self-esteem, it’s an opportunity for development, and not a step backwards. The author offers advice on how to maintain momentum after being denied a raise: 1) respond diplomatically, 2) unearth possible barriers and pressures, 3) propose alternatives, 4) master the art of authentic self-promotion, and 5) seek out additional advocates.

So Your Boss Refused to Give You a Raise

If you have something complex to say, you should always take the space to say it. But when your writing becomes unnecessary wordy and repetitive, your audience must figure out what you're saying instead of thinking about what you're saying. Writing something long is much easier and quicker than writing something shorter. Some strategies can help you write more effectively.

Extra words add up

Many workplace documents contain words that weigh it down, such as generally, basically, actually, kind of, really, virtually, totally, essentially, completely, practically, literally, and just. We may be so used to these words that it may sound odd without them. Consider if these words are essential to the meaning of your sentence. If not, cut them out.

Delete words that don’t add anything to your sentence

While we're figuring out what we think, we tend to say the same thing again in early drafts. To find overlapping sentences in your documents, try highlighting repetition as you edit.

Cut the overlap

When we draft a document, we're thinking about what we're doing, so we tell our readers what we're doing. However, your readers don't need to follow the journey. They need to know where you end up. Consider this sentence: "I will now offer you three steps we should take to improve our onboarding process". A better sentence is, "We should take three steps to improve our onboarding process."

Instead of telling us what you’re going to do in a sentence, just do it

It’s not the end of the world if you use an unnecessary word now and then, write the occasional overlapping sentence, or tell us what you’re doing in a sentence before you do it. But the extra words add up. In this article, the author offers advice for how to make your writing shorter and sharper.

writing

Reading & Writing

How to Write Concisely

“Raise your words, not voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder.”

“This place is a dream. Only a sleeper considers it real. Then death comes like dawn, and you wake up laughing at what you thought was your grief.”

“You are not a drop in the ocean. You are the entire ocean, in a drop.”

“Don’t be satisfied with stories, how things have gone with others. Unfold your own myth.”

Impacting quotes on life by one of the most influential personality 

Rumi quotes to inspire you to live and love better. Rumi truly believed that whatever you are seeking, is also seeking you.

personaldevelopment

Personal Development

motivationandinspiration

Motivation & Inspiration

Rumi Quotes on Life, Love and Strength That Will Inspire You

The idea behind a designated worry break is not to succumb to all the stress, but to concentrate your worrying time into a productive “session” of sorts. Stressful thoughts find a way to intrude and disrupt your daily life. By scheduling a separate chunk of time to address them all, you’ll be able to focus on other things throughout your day.

Why?

Choose your time to stress. Mark it in your calendar, set a reminder, and don’t bail on yourself. To start out, carve out 15 or so minutes once a week.When your scheduled worry break rolls around, it’s time to stress. But the key is to stress constructively.Try to get your worries down in words. Writing them down in list form is daunting, but an excellent practice in perspective. It helps to take abstract, overwhelming emotions surrounding each stress item, and then transforms them into what is bothering you on a more concrete (and manageable) level.

Choose Time

Next, dedicate time to each item on your list. Circle the ones that are ostensibly in your control. For instance, “my purpose in life” is a tad too abstract to tackle in this 15 minute session. However, something like “making time for my family” is a starting place for creating actionable solutions. For each stress item, try to brainstorm several potential solutions, e.g. “ask ____ for help” or “schedule a proper date night.”Not every source of stress has an actionable solution; in fact, a lack of obvious solutions is probably the source of a lot of your stress.

Dedicate Time and Write

As you get used to attending to your stressful thoughts, here are some guiding questions to ask yourself:<ul><li>Is this worry within my control?</li><li>What aspects of this concern are in and/or out of my control?</li><li>What mental hang-ups are making this stress worse?</li><li>How would I approach this if I had unlimited time and resources?</li><li>What is getting in the way of me overcoming this hurdle?</li><li>How do I really feel about this stress?</li><li>What is the ideal outcome in this situation?</li><li>What is a first step I can take?</li></ul>

Questions to guide your worry break


marketingandsales

Marketing & Sales

moneyandinvestments

Money & Investments

health

Health

Why You Should Schedule Your Stress

The Accountability Mirror is a mirror on which you write what your current situation is, how to get out of it, and what your goals are.

The Accountability Mirror

When your “bully” thinks you are about to give up, double down and show them you’re much tougher than they think you are!Taking souls is a practice aimed at silencing whoever is doubting you.

 Taking Souls

Every obstacle made you strong and prepared you for this very moment.The calloused mind is a practice that helps you double down when the temptation to quit is the strongest.

The Calloused Mind

When you go back to your past and identify all of the moments when you were weak, you free yourself from them and accept what happened.

On Accepting Yourself

Once the physical prep was done, he’d take care of the mental prep with visualization.He visualised what awaited him.He would imagine himself struggling, suffering, and eventually succeeding.

Visualization

On one hand, the painful moments made you who you are so you can ultimately triumph; on the other hand, the cookie jar is a promise for many more happy moments like the ones you’ve already had.

The Cookie Jar

Mastery does not tolerate shortcuts.The only way to go beyond your limitations is to do more, and better.

No Shortcut

The governor is that little voice in our head that tells us we suck and that we won’t make it.You need to do two things to take off your governor and access your full potential:<ol><li>Don’t listen to your voice.</li><li>When you feel like you cannot keep moving anymore, push just 5%-10% more. Doing so, you will unlock more potential.</li></ol>

The Governor

Goggins believes that most people live up to 40% of their potential.The remaining 60% is locked due to the governor.If you want to go over your 40%, you need to:<ol><li>Stretch your pain tolerance</li><li>Let go of your identity</li><li>Let go of your self-limiting beliefs</li></ol>

The 40% Rule

<ul><li>To everyone that ever doubted you — including yourself — the most powerful thing to answer is what if.</li><li>What if it was possible? What if they were wrong? What if you were right?</li><li>What if opens the door of possibility. It gets you to try and see what happens.</li><li>It keeps you moving forward.</li><li>It prevents you from quitting.</li></ul>

What If?

These are the 10 concepts Goggins used to push himself beyond his limits and achieved his victories. Use them with care.

This article is a list with all of David Goggins’ mental shifts to reach full potential. Enjoy!

habits

Habits

mentalhealth

Mental Health

All of David Goggins’ Mental Shifts to Reach Full Potential - Aure's Notes

<ul><li>The greatest compliment you can give to another person is to truly listen to them and demonstrate that you like the way they think. </li><li>The words, “I love that, give me a second to write it down,” can never damage someone’s impression of you.</li><li>Dale Carnegie got it right — “If you want to be interesting, be interested.</li></ul>

#1. Bring your notebook to conversations, not your phone

<ul><li>We all know remembering names is important, yet most people admit to being terrible at it.</li><li> Here’s a little trick: simply ask people to repeat their names at the end of the conversation — “I really enjoyed talking with you. I’m bad with names but I don’t want to forget yours. Would you mind telling me your name again?”</li></ul>

#2. Become a master at remembering people’s names

<ul><li>Most people worry so much about how they are going to start a conversation they forget how memorable a strong ending can be. </li><li>One of the easiest ways to accomplish this is to end the conversation by offering to connect the person you are speaking with to someone in your network who you think they may get along with.</li></ul>

#3. Focus on leaving a memorable last impression

<ul><li>Most people won’t open up to you about the big things in their lives if you don’t express interest in their little day-to-day happenings.</li><li>Ask people about their kids. Ask them how their job is going. Keep up-to-date with your local sports teams. Hell, even stop to talk to the woman at your corner deli about the weather.</li><li>These conversations may be boring, but they matter. And when done consistently they open the door for real talk to eventually take place.</li></ul>

#4. Show interest in small talk

<ul><li>“I’m writing an article about career advice. What’s your best tip?” or “I’m curious, do you think following your passion is good advice or terrible?” </li><li>These questions will get people talking about their experiences, careers, and interests and it’s hard not to like someone who does that.</li></ul>

#5. Master a few conversation starters

<ul><li>People may forget what you say, but they will never forget how you made them feel.</li><li>Sometimes the best way to accomplish this is by simply <a href="https://medium.com/better-marketing/the-best-communicators-know-when-to-shut-up-71371b783807">keeping your mouth shut</a> and focusing solely on being there for people around you.</li><li>Lean in when you sense something means a great deal to the person you are speaking with.</li></ul>

#6. Recognize when it’s best to keep your mouth shut

These tips will help introverts to get in the conversation and take most out of it.

As a kid, I was told time and time again that the fastest way to make a dent in the world was by leaving each person better than you found them. This sounded great to me on paper. There were just two…

6 Ways to Be More Likable by Saying Very Little

Over the past 12 years, Chris Anderson has had a ringside seat, listening to many hundreds of amazing TED speakers. He’s helped them prepare their talks for prime time, and learned directly from them the secrets of what makes for a great talk.And even though these speakers and their topics all seem completely different, they actually do have one key common ingredient. And it’s this: Your number one task as a speaker is to transfer into your listeners’ minds an extraordinary gift - a strange and beautiful object that we call an idea.

The #1 Task Of A Speaker

During a talk, X number of people, many of whom have never seen each other before, are finding that their brains are starting to sync with the speaker’s brain and with each other. They’re literally beginning to exhibit the same brain-wave patterns. They’re not just feeling the same emotions; there’s something even more startling happening.

Brains Sync

If we could look inside the speaker’s brain, we would see billions of interconnected neurons in an impossible tangle. But if we looked closer, we would see that a few million of them are linked to each other in a way which represents a single idea. And incredibly, this exact pattern is being recreated in real time inside the minds of everyone listening; in just a few minutes, a pattern involving millions of neurons is being teleported into X minds, just by people listening to a voice and watching a face.

Ideas Teleport

What is an idea anyway? Well, we can think of it as a pattern of information that helps us understand and navigate the world. Ideas come in all shapes and sizes, from the complex and analytical to the simple and aesthetic.Our minds are teeming with ideas, and not just randomly. They're carefully linked together. Collectively they form an amazingly complex structure that is our personal worldview. It’s our brain's operating system. It's how we navigate the world. And it is built up out of millions of individual ideas.

Our Ideas Are Our OS

That’s why ideas really matter: if communicated properly, they're capable of changing, forever, how someone thinks about the world, and shaping their actions both now and well into the future. Ideas are the most powerful force shaping human culture.

Human Software Update: New Ideas Installation

If you accept that your number one task as a speaker is to build an idea inside the minds of your audience, here are four guidelines for how you should go about that task: <ol><li>limit your talk to just one major idea</li><li>give your listeners a reason to care</li><li>build your idea, piece by piece, out of concepts that your audience already understands</li><li>make your idea worth sharing</li></ol>

Guidelines For Successfully Installing Ideas 

Ideas are complex things; you need to slash back your content so that you can focus on the single idea you’re most passionate about, and give yourself a chance to explain that one thing properly. You have to give context, share examples, make it vivid. So pick one idea, and make it the line running through your entire talk, so that everything you say links back to it in some way.

Limit Your Talk To Just One Major Idea

Before you can start building things inside the minds of your audience, you have to get their permission to welcome you in. And the main tool to achieve that? Curiosity. Stir your audience’s curiosity. Use intriguing, provocative questions to identify why something doesn’t make sense and needs explaining. If you can reveal a disconnection in someone’s worldview, they’ll feel the need to bridge that knowledge gap. And once you've sparked that desire, it will be so much easier to start building your idea.

Give Your Listeners A Reason To Care

You use the power of language to weave together concepts that already exist in your listener’ minds - but not your language, their language. You start where they are. The speakers often forget that many of the terms and concepts they live with are completely unfamiliar to their audiences. Now, metaphors can play a crucial role in showing how the pieces fit together, because they reveal the desired shape of the pattern, based on an idea that the listener already understands.

Build From Your Listeners’ Ground Up

Ask yourself the question: “Who does this idea benefit?” And be honest with the answer. If the idea only serves you or your organization, then, sorry, it’s probably not worth sharing. The audience will see right through you. But if you believe that the idea has the potential to brighten up someone else’s day or change someone else’s perspective for the better or inspire someone to do something differently, then you have the core ingredient to a truly great talk, one that can be a gift to them and to all of us.

Make Your Idea Worth Sharing

There's no single formula for a great talk, but there is a secret ingredient that all the best ones have in common. TED curator Chris Anderson shares this secret - along with four ways to make it work for us.

There's no single formula for a great talk, but there is a secret ingredient that all the best ones have in common. TED curator Chris Anderson shares this secret -- along with four ways to make it work for you. Do you have what it takes to share an idea worth spreading?

Understand yourself and those around you.

psychology

Psychology

business

Business

humanresources

Human Resources

TED's Secret To Great Public Speaking

<ol><li>Tell the audience what you’re going to say</li><li>Say it to your audience</li><li>Then tell them what you’ve said</li></ol>

3 Parts For Telling Something To An Audience

This popular advice allows speakers to hammer their points with repetition, but I wonder how many members of the audience will remain awake. Do you know who originated this tripartite template? I have seen it credited to the ancient philosopher Aristotle and the self-help pioneer Dale Carnegie.

At the end you have to review what you have already said. Here you may properly do what some wrongly recommend doing in the introduction-repeat your points frequently so as to make them easily understood. What you should do in your introduction is to state your subject, in order that the point to be judged may be quite plain; in the epilogue you should summarize the arguments by which your case has been proved.

At The End 

Radio expert John Horn says the continuing popularity of several stale and long-familiar comedy programs reminds him of the political spell-binder who gave this frank explanation for his success: “First I tells ’em what I’m gonna tell ’em. Then I tells ’em. Then I tells ’em what I told ’em.”

A friend presented me the concept and it made me curious

Tell ’Em What You’re Going To Tell ’Em

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